Love today

I do not think I am afraid to die, but I find myself asking God Please God can I stay long enough to see all three daughters married and I want to know my grandchildren. At times begging for more time and I wonder why do my thoughts go here ? I am unsure of that answer but after seeing Eric's story I will not deny the whisper I hear and I know the voice. As my body already shows signs of failing at 47 years old and my mind now starts to not know where it is sometimes, lost when I recognize where I am, with the cardiovascular problems and the doctors trying to save my legs and my life, yet unable to put down the cigarette which could buy me more time, In the end of it all I have no control, the day has already been determined, the plan is God's and I surrender to my God and king! My life is not my own and I will treasure the moments that I have right now not worrying about tomorrow and Love with all I have today...